On Love Songs and Sharpies

There was a lengthy period of my life (read: age eighteen to present) when I felt that I could perfectly encapsulate any given moment, relationship or person in a list of songs that I wrote in fine-point sharpie in my journal. Some of them were pretty apt, as there is an pretty wide swath of common ground between a white middle-class former college student singing mopey acoustic songs and a white middle class college student listening to them, and some of them were outright ridiculous, as I am not now, nor have I ever been, born to run.
Most of the songs I put on these lists were love songs, because most of the time if I was taking the time to make lists about you in my journal, I pretty sure I was in love with you. I was almost invariably wrong, but it never seemed to slow down the lists. Some songs showed up on a lot of different lists, and some songs only showed up once. To celebrate this most...celebrated of days, I carefully assessed the lists and came up with Emily's Top Eight (Sort Of) Love Songs.

1.) A Case of You - Joni Mitchell.

I goddamn love this song. I have loved this song since I was ten, and see no reason why I will not continue to love it for the rest of my life. Her voice is perfect, the lyrics are perfect (Where's that at? If you want me, I'll be in a bar.) and I cannot imagine a more graceful, nuanced depiction of what it's like to love someone a lot and regret it sometimes.

2.) All My Little Words - Magnetic Fields.

This one was a frequent star on my journal lists, telling as it does the story of a broody, boy-obsessed malcontent who couldn't make boys like him by writing a lot. It also mentions North Carolina, a favorite state of mine.

3.) What a Good Girl - Barenaked Ladies.

Once upon a time, I was seventeen years old and I lived in a small town in Rhode Island and I thought this band was speaking with the VOICE OF MY SOUL. I have since gotten older and become intensely embarrassed about this period in my life, but the fact remains that once I was much younger and this perfectly nice song about nice kids feeling pressured to succeed at school and really, really loving each other in a guilty kind of way was pretty true to my life. Let us speak of this no more.

4.) Sleepwalking - Modest Mouse

This is my "music video" song, where it plays in the background of all of my memories of one summer, some of which I did spend raiding liquor cabinets and walking by the riverside. Now I find it a little too indie-hipster cool, but I feel the same way about the guy I spend the summer with, so it works itself out in the end.

5.) Always See Your Face - Love

When I have major decisions to make I will sometimes say a question out loud and punch the shuffle button on my iPod, with the idea being that the next song will provide the solution to my problem. This song has come up every time I've hit that button for the last three years, so take from that what you will.

6.) Sally Go Round the Roses - The Jaynettes

Not technically speaking a love song, actually more along the lines of an excellent song to do the pony to, but there was one summer that I spent a lot of time walking around the Quarter listening to this on headphones and thinking, wow, yeah, the saddest thing in the whole wide world is to see your baby with another girl. And then I'd do the pony.

7.) Tonight I'll Be Staying Here With You - Bob Dylan

There were a lot of contenders for the Bob Dylan spot on this list, but this track of of Nashville Skyline won. Why? It's simple, it's pretty as hell, and it's a great song to listen to if you happen to be traveling to see your long-distance partner.

8.) You Were Always on My Mind - Willie Nelson

This song could also go on the short list of "Songs that make me weep like an infant". This song vaults out the realm of love songs and straight into something closely resembling emotional pornography. One time a friend told me that this was her favorite song, and I was absolutely stunned that anyone could stand to listen to it more than once every six months.